Wednesday, December 29, 2004

Window into my World

I am working on cleaning my room so I have a safe haven from the world....till I am on the open road again...life is not going easy....DOES it EVER?

Here is pics from my room...

 My bulletin board, and shelves...next to bed.

 My guitar, lavender plant, and Celtic "God is our Rock"
on top of Chest of drawers.

 My wall shelves, the owl lamp was a gift from Grandma F.
and belonged first to her mother.

And thats my room, at least as much as I will show thee at this time... Blessings friends!

 ~ Traveller Gal, out!

Sunday, December 26, 2004

Christmas in Oklahoma

 Traveled this Christmastide to my Grandma Fitzpatick's (from the Gaelic: Mac Giolla Phadriag) in Poteau, OK.  She lives near Long Lake, Cavanal (world's tallest hill), and the Ouachita National Forest. The Fitzpatrick Hillside is 13 acers of woodlands, own by her, my mom, and 2 uncles.  As a child this place was like a second home to me, especially over summers, which often were spent running through the woodlands with my cousins.  At 17, I built a Celtic hunters hut from ceder bows... it took 2 years to come apart, and ruins still remain!


Christmas was relaxing... nothing eventful, just Christmas at Grandma's.  I was blessed to get a 1611 KJV Bible, an Amy Brown Fairy Journal, a Mic for the the comp, another journal (hmm...people know I like to write it seems), and Runts candy.  Grandma  also had me go to the store and pick up the light blue sleeping bag I wanted, and told me it is my birthday present.  ^_^   Good timing, since my old one just broke.

Wonderful as this all was, it seems a shadow had passed over things.  Why I do not know... it feels as though this was the last Christmas that will be this way.  The last of a season.  Am I moving soon?  Is Grandma leaving us soon (her health has been poor for a while)?  Who knows where this winter path goes, but it has come unbidden and thus must be journeyed on.... God be with me...

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Saturday, December 4, 2004

Refections on Life

I have been doing a lot of searching in the last 5 and 1/2 years...ever since I first took soo ill...

One thing I have found...is my views of God have changed...I see him now as more of a Father who lovingly watches over me and tends to me...then this power station I plug into...LOL.

Another, I have learned...no amount of ministry will make me happy...I love to do it...but I am happiest and the most at peace...in a small group of loved ones...or just me and the open road.




I know that my dream house is a small one...decorated minimally with Celtic, Native, and Tribal items.

That more stuff...means more stress...and MORE WORK...LOL.

And that... true love is worth waiting for and fighting for...even if you have to fight yourself for it. ^_^

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Refection Time...

Why is it that I love the thoughts behind Thanksgiving and Christmas... but I hate the mad rush...the over shoping....and the business that these Holidays have come to hold?   LOL. 

To me Christmastide is a time to reflect on our Lord.... and it should be calm and peaceful...maybe a bit of wild Celtic music too...but not the craziness these holidays have become.   SIGH!




~ Traveller Gal, out!

Tuesday, November 9, 2004

Maiden Beneth the Tree

Who is this maiden I see, sitting here beneth this tree?
Her heart is full of dreams, her face is set like a flent to her path...
Lady with your heart so full of dreams what is it you lack?

"Good friend, tis true my dreams and path are clear...
'Tis true I am a woman of vision and of purpose,
Yet this one thing do I lack...
 He who was made for me...and I for he."

Ahh, sweet maid, be at peace I say, for when
that day shall come...then all shall know thy joy.

I wrote this some time ago...but felt like sharing it just today.  Enjoy.

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Monday, October 18, 2004

Cloudy Day ^_^

Greetings!  'Tis a beautiful cloudy day here...and I am going job hunting...  Things are not easy, as always.... but I remain hopeful.  May haps soon funds will begin coming in, and I can start really planning to get back on the road.  I have to get my license and then the "Wagon" and I, along with my bike, "Meg", can be on our way...  To where ever God has for me!!!  ^_^

~ Traveller Gal, out!
 

Sunday, October 10, 2004

Black Pottrey

I thought I knew who I was... in truth...I knew who I thought I was... who sorrow and tragedy have made me... God showed me I am to be his special black pottery...so specially made...and very rare.  I am to be a blending of the cultures I have loved so well, Native American, Celtic, and Traveller. 

 I am so much and so little all at once.   I dont fit in most places no matter how I try.   Even where I feel most loved...around the table at my grandma's house...I feel an outsider.  I am at home in the forest...or sitting around talking of the Word and olden times...or working out ideas for missions work...or out on the open road...and not many other places...

Seeings as that is the case...and missions work...is where I am most at home...that way will head... now to get training.

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Thursday, October 7, 2004

Baptized

Last night, I was baptized along with about 6 others, mostly middle schoolers who have just given their hearts to God.  Their teacher, Chris, was re-baptized, because when he was baptized he was not serving God.  I wanted to do it, because not having be baptized...nagged at me so much.   I am hyper!!!!

From the edge of the earth,
To the height of the sky,
My spirit sores to You.
From the depths of my heart,
And these blood washed lips,
Your praises I do sing!!!


~ Traveller Gal, out!

Wednesday, September 29, 2004

Fall Warobe

I am putting together my fall wardrobe...I am sooo glad for cool weather...my poor velvets are hanging so lonely in the closet... I have a green and tan crushed velvet dress, a black crush velvet cape, a black velvet duster, and a combo velvet skirt (5 layers of diffrent black fabric)...plus may tops to match up with this stuff...plus I have to hunt down pants...since most of mine are TOO little.  Well at least I am closer to a health weight...and that is a good thing.

Any ideas for clothing?

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Monday, September 20, 2004

Tiny Boat

I have felt like I am in this small boat, riding on the waves in the middle of a bad storm with out any oars....and the storm is just getting worse.  Yet still light peaks through the storms, though the grow stronger...

But, at least my heart is at peace.   I know Iosa is watching over the boat and I will make it to the other shore.

* Iosa is Irish Gaelic for Jesus.

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Thursday, August 26, 2004

Bad news and the Open Road

RATS, RATS, RATS!!!   My seizures are not treatable normally because instead of just being simple little seizures...they come from my immune dis-regulation...and thus we have to find and treat the cause of that (a mystery these past 5 years...) to treat the seizures!!!

 I am traveling up north, visit friends and family...august 13th-19th....  I am changing, and growing...just sometimes not in ways that meets the eyes yet.   My friends, thank you for your prayers....I am becoming stronger, if not in body then in spirit.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Lord God Almighty, Maker of Heaven and Earth!   I praise you for gentle breeze, for the beautiful flowers painting the world with color, for the singing of the birds, and rolling silvery clouds.

Thank You for the gift of love: mother, father, family, friend, and more.  Thank You for friendships dear which have come acrossed the years.

Most of all Thank You Father for the gift of this Life, here to live...and Thy Name to Praise for the Salvation You did give.  AMEN!"

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Friday, August 20, 2004

Two Paths

My friends....I have two paths before me...one of known and "comfort" though my soul is in misery.   The other unknown, no comfort, but a chance at a new life.... One will cost me everything...but I don't know which one for sure.

At last, I have peace and guidance for my soul.  The haze is lifting and the path is see able through it.   I, though weak in body, am now ready to run...the journey is before me.

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Wednesday, July 14, 2004

Seizures and Poetry

My body continues to weaken....though the seizures are not quiet as intince now that I am not working all day in the heat.

I should be getting in to see a doctor very soon about my seizures...keep that in prayer...I am scared.  In fact here are the dates for my appointments...
MRI the 19th
EEG the 28th
see doc (nervous system) August 9th
I hate being as weak as I am....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bitter torcher in my flesh,
As each night this torment doth return,
and my strength is again drained.

God of ligh
t, I thank Thee for the mercy
A loving warrior, my love to be.
I thank Thee that tis he who does now care for me.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A lone maiden wonders acrossed the misty moors,
her
steps are slow and painful
her heart is heavy with sorrow.


Towards the ashen skys she lifts her head and crys,
"Is there no one to journey this road with me, my God?
Is there none who can handle tending to this princess?


To so many I am a warrior maiden,
never seeming to need there aid.
But You, my Father, know just how I really am.
For beneath this warrior's armor is an ill little girl."

She stood quietly the tears streaming down.

Twas not long before a princely knight came up beside her.
He knelt before her, "Princess, my sword is yours..."
He rose up and cradled her in his arms.
"My love, you I shall protect and tend to.
Together we shall fight the battle Our God has called us to.
I will never leave you."

The princess settled into his arms, and together the two journeyed on.


This is what I long for...when I am alone.

~ Traveller Gal, out!




Thursday, July 1, 2004

Illness Returns, Again

My seizures are back with a vengeance....Pray for my strength to withhold during these spells, and for me to have the courage to tell my parents.

Mom had me check my temp and all...because I am being so low...both emotionally and physically...and once again I am in a spell...grr.

I am planing to go swiming tonight....

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Saturday, June 26, 2004

Of Bare Feet and Bicycles

I am a traveller gal, a gypsy of sorts... nothing makes me happier than to dash about with my feet bare.  To splash about in the puddles of a summer thunder storm.  To dance in the rain and feel each drop caress my face.

I long for the open road, just me and my bicycle, "Meg".  If it were up to me, I would set off a crossed country just me, "Meg", and what ever I could fit in a bike trailer.  I would stay at churches, visit friends, and just be free.  Would that I were healthier, so that I might do it!

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Thursday, June 24, 2004

Spirit Inside Awakens

Some times, to stir the coals of the spirit woman, one must go back to the first things, the simple worship and dancing foolishly before His thrown, the morning devotional book, the prayer, and the Bible reading, and not doing because one has to...but from the heart....

Joy comes like the first moonbeams of the summer's eve, and the newly twinkling stars of the night sky...so pure and so sweet.

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Sunday, June 13, 2004

Balm

Hands of Mercy, Hands of Grace, Flowing down from Thy Divine place.

Words of Love, Words of Joy, Dancing into my immortal soul.

Look of Peace, Look of Promise, Shining out from Thy Holy face. Soothing balm, Soothing clam, have now You sent to me to fill this my bitter hole. 



~ Traveller Gal, out!

Sunday, June 6, 2004

Broken Wings

Being a fool for Christ is not that hard, when you have been a fool anyway.   LOL.   Then again, a fool for Christ is a totally different breed of fool.


Living day to day is so strange and new...this is an exciting adventure.   I am now able to slow down and not worry so much.   If I have a job tomorrow, I will.   If love lasts, it will.  If food is here, it is.   I am not as far as I need to be, but it is a start...and wow.  Open road your traveller gal is returning soon.

Filling out job app. today.  LOL.

Also, made a new friend in Robby "Jesus Freak" Nickles... he is a good guy.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fallen Angel with broken wings,
The ash clouding thine eyes.
When will the dust settle,
And the ink turn green?


Fallen Angel with broken wings
The ash choking thy song,
When will the air clear,
And  the music ring true?


Fallen Angel now restored,
The ash now flown away,
Now the ink is green,
And the song is true.

Write and praise now,
Thy Holy King.


2004 - MMH/MMN 

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Wednesday, June 2, 2004

Tattered souls...

Bitter sorrow and torment, we sent Thee to.
Suffering and and pain were Thy lot,
Until by death You did part,
Then to life returned.

Why did You call these tatter souls Thine?
Why do You want us at Thy feast?
We who did betray You to Thy DEATH.

Why it is we do not know,
Yet here in the shaddowlands,
Beside the old worn cross faith does come alive,
As Thy holy blood cleans this tattered soul. 



2004 - MMH/MMN

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Wednesday, April 28, 2004

Ashy Skies


God, burn up all the ugly parts of my life!  Kill the parts of me that You dont want around.   I hate this life like it is right now, with such pain and sorrow.  Burn out the sin burn out the evil, leave only what You will in their place.

 Amen!


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

I don't know where I am headed...I once did... but all this craziness has clouded my view.   God help me see the path again... the ash in the sky is to thick!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Gaze to heaven, soul in ashes,
Heart on fire, life in rune,
Trials and turmoils,
Joys and blessings,
All this way do come.

Gaze above, life shadows
Heart alive, soul in distress,
Pain and death,
Healing and life,
All this way do come.

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Wednesday, April 7, 2004

Refections: 1

"Riches I heed not nor man's empty praise, THOU mine inheritance now and always! "~ Be Thou My Vision

Let me tell you a  bit about the woman I am becoming again....

I am a fun loving, dedicated Christian...committed to purity, honesty, humility, and a simplistic lifestyle.   I am into Celtic Christianity and the history of Native America, especially the Navajo.   Personally I am a traveller gal.  It does not take much to make me happy, a dry place to sleep, some food, good friends, and mi lord. 

I am kinda shy except with those I am close to, but this is partially because I don't want to hurt others.   In the past I have been like poison, so until I am sure I am not again...I tend to hang back a bit.  Once I open up though, I tend to be bold and confesses my soul to you.

That is who I am right now... growing in God... spending time daily in HIS Word.  Praying, seeking His will, and living for Him....seeking a chance to get back on the open road.

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Friday, April 2, 2004

Dreams for Future...


I love life, but not as I am facing it now.   I wish I could go back to January 2001 when life was really good... keep the good friends I have made since then, but go back to a simpler time...when my biggest worry was getting money to go on a Missions trip.

I am just heart sick, in more ways than I can list.   I just want to live a simple life a way from this crazy world.   Maybe settle into traveling with a good husband, have a few kids, and create safe havens for youth...  So simple, yet so complex is that dream.

You know, I can do like Paul... put the past with its great trimps and great tribulations behind me.   If he can do it so can I.  It wont be easy, but what in life is anymore?

Oh, for the simplicity of life on the open road again!

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Saturday, March 20, 2004

Journey to Ft. Wayne


Well, i am at my aunt's for a while... then heading to Kansas...till i get money and license...then may haps  back to MI.   ^_^

It is time to let God start making a path for my life.  I must look into more schooling... and where to get the money for it.   I am praying to get to go back to Michigan... at least until I have money and some training like at Visions.   Who knows... one plan changes and God opens another door.
Life is so strange... but worth living.   At least GOD brings great good out of great darkness as only HE can.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Spent yesterday with my Aunt Nel and 2nd cousins Ashley and Liz.   Got a beautiful dress for prom alteritive and stuff to go with it.  Still need gloves, a purse, and shoes, but those will come with time.
 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~ Traveller Gal, out!

I love begin a traveller gal, but this road is so not easy!

Friday, February 27, 2004

Changes

Mi corp i mort a an saol a an.  (my body is dead to the world.)

Life is so confusing... just when you think you can see what is going on it all changes.   God I hand this mess over to you.  Just use me as You see fit.

I will be honest... I am struggling with my faith at the moment.   I do that off and on.   I get on a high with my faith then come down sometimes into the very darkest valleys so to speak.   It seem to be that this is just the storm before life falls in place.... WHO AM I TO KNOW????

Days change, people change, but not always as one would pray.  Why is nothing seeming to go as it should?   God why do You take so long?   This is trying to the soul... but that is the point isn't it?  Nothing worth fighting for comes easy?  RIGHT?

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Sunday, January 18, 2004

21 Years...

Well, my 21st birthday rocked.   I went shopping with a few friends.... so I got a cool Nightmare Before Christmas shirt ) and a "stone" mirror.   I also bought for normal price some chain earrings.   Got a fishnet shirt at JC Penny's for $0.77!!!

I am doing really well at the internship.... it appears that the Upper Room Youth Center is a go.   I will find out for sure at next months conceal meeting. 

My health is a mess.   Not so much that I am really that ill.... it is just the crazy spells I have.   Fainting, breathing problems... every joint in my body hurting.   I wish I was stronger... but maybe it is in the weakness I am meant to help another.  Only Iosa knows for sure, and therefore I trust in Him. 

God help me through this... please, if be Your will, either heal me now... or show me who I am to aid by in my trials still being faithful to YOU.  Amen.

~ Traveller Gal, out!

Monday, January 12, 2004

Broken soul

Broken soul, no place of her own,
Broken soul, no love to call her home,
Broken soul, no wings to fly on,
Broken soul, no tears left to cry,
Broken soul, no will left to live,
Broken soul, no strength to die,
Broken soul, no place of her own.


~ Traveller Gal, out!

Sunday, January 4, 2004

Leaving Kansas

1 day left in Kansas... I am both loving the thought of leaving... and yet it is so bittersweet to leave behind all my friends.   Well, I will be back to visit.

I saw my cousin, Jaime, yesterday at the mall.  We hung out for an hour... it  was fun to see her face while we were in some of the stores: we have such different tastes.   I got a journal for all my must privit thoughts... one with a lock so no one, like my little "brother", can read them.

~ Traveller Gal, out!


Mom is throwing me a going away party at my church.   I kinda like the idea... but it is just so hard to say goodbye... or even if I will see you later or in heaven, if not before.  * Sigh*  Well, life must go on... as must I.

A traveller gal am I, and this is the price of such a life...